Friday, September 5, 2014

Kleefisch Leads Wisconsin GOP's War On Metaphors

[Updated from Thursday.] Wisconsin Lieutenant Governor and opponent of furniture abuse Rebecca Kleefisch is leading the counter-attack on DNC chairwoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz for saying, among several colorful turns of phrases, that Scott Walker's policies have given women "the back of his hand."

I used to be a Wasserman Schultz fan, but she burst my balloon by letting let Kleefisch get the ball rolling ahead of the curve by turning lemons into lemonade.

"Hideous," Kleefisch said. Right she is. See Kleefisch's precise, honest speech, and how she wears her heart on her sleeve. The Walker campaign is well within its rights to cry alligator tears  stamp its foot raise some money off its principled, righteous indignation. 

After all, you can't expect mining companies and millionaires to be the only cash cow golden goose to carry all the freight.

And this political business requires a lot more than a penny for your thoughts. Money doesn't grown on trees, so that's why you have to strike while the iron's hot.

Thank goodness this hideous cloud has a silver lining

I meant to say that managing all this political business in a state that's thrown open to donations business requires a lot of hard, behind-the-scenes, slyly-coordinated, legally-questionable fund-raising work. 

Danged metaphors! It's hard to see the forest for the trees, and thanks to Kleefisch for pulling us back from the brink.

Along with similies and idioms of all kinds, metaphors are the source of our collective misery. Like weeds in your garden, they ruin the landscape. She's right on it:ing

Me: My sister is splitting her hostas; I can have some! Joel: Hostas r the dryer lint of the garden.
Verbal shortcuts, not calculated, hard-edge ideological decisions aimed at those with the least political clout, are the real problem in Wisconsin politics; kudos to Kleefisch for being Johnny-on-the-spot, with eyes peeled and her nose to the grindstone to show us the lay of the land courageously outspoken.

And I expect to see Walker and Kleefisch take issue with the just-released handicapping of potential GOP 2016 candidates that downgrades Walker from #2 to #9, and, worse, alleges that "his halo has slipped" over the recent fund-raising disclosures. 

Does that pundit have all his beans buttered?

Shouldn't he have said that Walker's carefully-crafted image is fading because of questionable practices disclosed in court documents filed by prosecutors and under review pending a hearing later this month in front of a three-judge panel of the United States Seventh Circuit Court Appeals in Chicago, IL?

As for Wasserman Schultz: She should have used a lot of bigger words to make her point, like 'Walker is denying women access to legal, life-saving medical services, fair and humane wages that support families and children, and full, hard-won workplace legal protections against workplace gender discrimination.'

That way Wassserman Schultz wouldn't be wiping egg off her face that hit her when Kleefisch backed her into a corner so Walker could make hay with donors having deep pockets.

So let's all agree that using idioms or images to make a point is a reckless, slippery slope, and no one should know that better than Kleefisch who will always bear this same-sex marriage cross:
"This is a slippery what point are we going to OK marrying inanimate objects? Can I marry this table, or this, you know, clock? Can we marry dogs?"
In fact, someone should give the back of her hand to her not-so-better half for this metaphorical misdemeanor:
Kleefisch: Cranes are the 'ribeye of the sky'


Anonymous said...

The Kleefisch's are certainly a credit to government in Wisconsin along the same lines as Glen Grothman. She didn't have a hissy fit when husband Joel was running among the Assembly desks pushing the voting button for absent members. Where did she surface with these comments as we've had peace and quiet for several months with only an occasional idiotic comment from Joel now and again!

Anonymous said...

This is sure to become a classic Rowen piece. I will copy and save in my scrapbook. Well done.

A. Wag said...

Bimbo Becky strikes again.

A. Wag said...

What's really 'hideous' is Becky pretending to care about real women.

Boxer said...

hid-e-ous. That's a 3-syllable word, isn't it? Maybe we should be giving the Beckster credit for using one in a sentence. Was it a complete sentence?

Betsey said...

Kleefisch family pillow talk: "Becky, you're the ribeye of my eye!'

"Joel, would you marry me if I was a chair? at the Jobs Fair? what if I was a dog? running down bears in a bog? what if I was a clock? carrying a Glock? driving in a minivan? reading to kids 'Sam-I-Am'? would you love me anyway, even if we both were gay?"